


The Weight of Tears

by Evee_chan



Category: In the Bleak Midwinter (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Illustrated Fic, getting trapped together, lots of hugging and crying, probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:47:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28886343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evee_chan/pseuds/Evee_chan
Summary: Walls are torn down and tears abound, Omega's humanity shines through.
Relationships: Anya/Omega
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	The Weight of Tears

**Author's Note:**

> First fic I've ever written for In the Bleak Midwinter; I hope it's alright ;v;
> 
> Unbeta'd as usual! And just a note that this was written at the end of the first season. There's much we don't know yet and if there are future inconsistencies, that's why

_Boom._

Another blast shakes the rubble above their heads and debris comes raining down on them.

With a groan, Anya opens her eyes and squints up into the darkness. There’s a heavy weight on top of her, crushing her and it’s difficult to breathe. It’s a surprise that the rubble hasn’t completely crushed her, she thinks as she tries to heave it off. Maybe it did already, and it’s just one more time among many in which her body refuses to give up. One more time where her cells grow and mend and heal her relentlessly, until genetic deterioration destroys her from the inside out.

Whatever it is doesn’t move however, instead the movement causes it to settle more heavily on Anya and driving the breath from her lungs. There’s a sharp pain stabbing her chest and panic starts to claw at her throat at the idea that maybe she actually _will_ die here, cold and alone and smashed into bits so small that no amount of her cells stitching back together will keep her alive.

Anya freezes when there’s a small breeze and something tickles her cheek. In the faint light filtering through the cracked walls, she sees what is actually pinning her down. In her panic she missed the torn jacket, the head of silver hair, the limbs caging her in as the building collapsed around them.

Now she has even more reason to be breathless.

“Omega.” Anya hisses, shaking him. “Wake up.” She shakes him again harder this time and she hears a click, followed by a faint whirring noise. She feels, rather than sees the cyborg wake up. His chest jolts as if he takes a breath, and Anja wonders whether he even needs to breathe or if it’s more habitual than anything. Her cheek tickles again and she realizes that it’s Omega’s hair, silky against her skin.

_I never realized how soft his hair is, I wish I could run my fingers through it…_

Omega shifts and Anya’s musings stutter to a halt. The entire length of his body is pressed against hers, warm and solid and it’s all she can do to hold back a whimper from escaping her lips.

With a strained grunt, Omega pushes up and off her, showering her with the dirt that had settled over them both and they cough in the resulting dust cloud. The coughing sounds wet, giving way to a half aborted moan and Anya sees him double over in pain and it hits her why there was a sharp pain in her chest. A twisted piece of metal is embedded in his back all the way in and even piercing through the front of his chest. There’s red and black dribbling down Omega’s chin in thick rivulets. Anya looks at her own clothes feeling it warm and sticky and similarly smeared in his blood.

“I need to get this out.” Omega grits out, teeth clenched. “Either help me or don’t.”

Before Anya can even warn him _no don’t pull it out or you’ll bleed to death,_ he’s already grabbed it and yanked it out. The squelching noise makes her want to throw up, and the sharp pained pants that follow makes her heart hurt for him.

“Don’t be an idiot!” She says hotly. “You’re gonna lose too much blood with a gaping hole in your chest.” She grabs the edge of her shirt with her teeth and rips it, balling it up in her hands. She helps the cyborg sit against the wall, pressing the wad of fabric against his chest. The wound leaks sluggishly, soaking through the thin fabric easily.

The silence rings in her ears almost painfully, but at least the explosions and fighting seemed to have stopped.

“We need to get you out of here quick.” Anya murmurs, almost to herself. “I don’t know enough about cyborg anatomy to know how to help you…”

“I sent an SOS to my brother already.” Omega shoots back bluntly. “I’ve scanned the premise and there’s no way to escape. Not with just the gun I have. We’ll have to wait for him.”

Anya nods at that and sighs, pulling away the scrap of fabric to check on the injury and gapes. Amidst the broken wires and circuitry, there’s light spilling from the hole and weaving itself back together bit by bit. It has already puckered and scarred over but still weeps the tiniest bit.

“You overreacted too much.” He grouses.

Anya scoffs, affronted. “I said I don’t know enough about your kind to know what to do.” Gentler, she whispers, “I was afraid. I was afraid you got hit by a dramaxil weapon again. Or somehow your systems got compromised.”

Omega chuckles darkly. “As you can see, I’m just fine. They didn’t have dramaxil weapons today, they probably ran out. It won’t be long until they strike back at us though, looking for more to use against us.”

Anya frowns at that, brows pinched. “It’s not something to laugh about.”

Sighing, she softly she places a hand over his chest, still glowing bright and warm under her fingers.

“I’m sorry that this war keeps dragging on. I’m sorry I hurt you too, right here. Again and again, over and over.” Anya presses her palm firmer against his chest, as if she could press the apology straight into his heart, make Omega feel her regret.

“I’m sorry...” She whispers again, tears thick in her throat. It’s all too much and Anya leans forward, dropping her forehead against Omega’s shoulder.

It’s warmer than Anya expects. She thought Omega would be cold, cold like his eyes, cold like his sharp words. She can feel a thrumming reverberating through her hand, pulsing almost like a heart would. She wonders if under different circumstances they would have still been this way, so at odds with one another.

It’s so warm, and she’s missed the comfort of another live being so, so damn much and it’s not long before the walls around her heart cracks. Tears spill forth and soak into Omega’s jacket. Her nose starts running too and a hiccoughing sob escapes from deep within her chest.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what overcame me…” Anya babbles, pulling back and swiping at her nose with a grubby sleeve.

Omega shakes his head and averts his eyes. Awkwardly, he puts his arms around Anya’s shoulders and pulls her back. “It’s fine.” He mumbles gruffly. He settles her back where she was before but this time with stiff arms around her in an attempt to soothe her.

“But! I’m gonna get snot and tears all over you!” Anya insists, pushing against Omega’s chest.

“But nothing.” He replies shortly, putting a hand on the back of her head and pressing her face more firmly against his shoulder. “Wipe your nose on my jacket if you need to, it’s ruined already."

Wordlessly Anya buries herself closer and folds her arms around Omega’s strong body, silent sobs wracking her body once more. It hurts, _it hurts so much._ She longs for a time, a world in which she could just hold him like this without worry. Love her soulmate without being afraid.

An indeterminate amount of time passes before her tears run out. She feels Omegas shoulders shake minutely, tension tightening his whole body. “I’m sorry, that was uncomfortable for you I’m sure…” Anya says, leaning back to look at him.

Anya’s heart drops.

Omega looks away but there’s no hiding the streaks of tears down his face, right side luminous in the faint light. On the left is inky black and thick like the blood that poured from his chest.

“Oh, Omega…” Anya whispers, cupping his cheek. She wipes away the tears with her thumb and smears the oily blackness against pale skin. “I’m sorry I--”

“Stop apologizing.” He hisses, voice thin and wavering. “Stop apologizing so much. You didn’t do anything. I hurt you too, just as much if not more. I _killed_ you, Anya. I let you die again and again even though you’re my soulmate.

“ _Even though you’re my soulmate._ ” He whispers again. He takes Anya’s hand in his, the one still resting on his cheek and lifts her wrist to his lips. Presses a searing hot kiss to the glowing numbers that match his own.

“I’m sorry, too.” Omega says, locking eyes with Anya, fathomlessly deep eyes wet with tears.

“I guess we’re even then.” Anya murmurs, face burning. She doesn’t know what that press of lips is supposed to mean. Her heart stutters like maybe it will stop, but she feels very much alive.

“I’ll thank you instead.” She says. “Thank you for saving me and getting hurt in my stead. Thank you for saving me all those other times. For all the times you could have hurt me but didn’t. For all the times you went against your brother’s orders for my sake. Thank you.”

A breath catches in Omega’s throat, more tears dripping down his cheeks but it seems like he’s not even aware of it anymore. His eyebrows twist and it’s the most expression Anya has seen on him, the most vulnerable he has left his heart for her.

“It’s okay.” She says. She takes Omega’s face in her hands and guides him towards her, holding him close. “I’m alive. We’ll figure this out together.” She promises him, heartbeat strong in his ear, hands petting his hair. Running the silver strands between her fingers, it’s just as feather-soft as she thought it would be.

“Okay…” He breathes, nodding against her chest. “Okay.” His arms come around her again, this time without hesitation. Grips her tight like if he lets go she’ll disappear.

They stay like that until the broken cement above them crumbles and lifts away, light streaming down. An unmistakable figure in white greets them.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, thank you so very much! I'm not the best writer so let me know how I can do better (It's prolly totally OOC as well but *shrugs*)


End file.
